Sleepless Nights

Sleep has been a source of extreme frustration these last few weeks. On Sunday, I had no problem falling asleep. I was super tired from the running around and house cleaning of the weekend that I passed right out. For a while. Around 3am I woke up, used the bathroom, and thought, “Oh, I’m so tired, I’ll fall right back asleep.” Silly me.

I’ve had problems falling asleep for years. When I was younger, it was all about staying up late for the sheer amount of anger it caused my mom. And then it became a habit in college. Everyone I knew stayed up late, went out to the bar, studied at the all night diner. I took late classes to allow myself the freedom for staying up. However, I’ve been working an 8am – 5pm job now since 2007. Come on, brain, get with the times. We’re on a normal schedule here.

The key for me has always been keeping my brain busy. I read myself to sleep, watch episodes of shows on near mute, do sudokus and crossword puzzles. However, lately, my brain just decides that at 3am, it’s done sleeping.

I guess the key is trying to figure out what’s waking me up at night. There is something in my brain, some thought or idea or fear, that is worming around in there and causing me an untold amount of anxiety. I have a very fast paced, busy job, but I’ve always had that. My child is getting older and there are more worries that come with aging, but nothing I’m thinking about all the time. We need to find an apartment at the end of the summer, but that shouldn’t be awful. Is it everything combined?

Is life waking me up in the middle of the night? How do I remedy life’s everyday stresses?

How do other’s who have insomnia fall asleep?


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