Today I Will Mourn, Tomorrow I Will Fight

“Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that’s even remotely true.” -Homer Simpson

Well, Homer Simpson, it seems you were right.

Sleep last night sleep was impossible, and as the map of the United States became filled with red, my heart sped up and the anxiety and nausea set in. What was I to tell my child? What was I to do? How did America overwhelmingly vote such a vulgar, racist, misogynistic man into the most powerful, influential job in the country? And so many have done so happily and with a sense of overwhelming well being, completely disregarding his lack of knowledge, his dishonest claims, and his hate speech. Some did so because they wanted change, some did so because they liked Clinton less. The outcome is the same; Love did not win, not last night.

I’ve been thinking about what to write and how to make sense of my feelings. I’m not socially outspoken these days, and my anxiety has worsened. Most days I don’t leave my house. However, I know that there are so many people out there who spread the message of love and acceptance. It is time that I stop letting my own insecurities get in the way and get more involved. I’m not sure how, but I will be doing some research.

I am saddened. Was I naive to believe that there was no question more people would vote against such a hateful, fear mongering campaign? Was it naive of me to believe that republicans and democrats alike would vote against someone with absolutely no political or military experience? Someone propagating hateful, non inclusive rhetoric? Are there so many people who look past all of the hate speech just because Hillary Clinton was not who they wanted?

Like many, I am saddened and depressed, but soon that will pass. We will move on, life will take over, problems will arise, and the day to day will begin again. But for today, I will mourn this loss of my faith in love and togetherness. Tomorrow will be the day I fight to regain my faith in humanity. Tomorrow I will remember that there is so much love, so much kindness, and so many people willing to work together to make sure we are safe and accepted despite our differences; parents and sons and daughters and grandparents who are teaching their kids and friends and family about love and acceptance. Tomorrow, and four years from now, I will not be passive, I will not be scared. There are others voicing these opinions as well. We are not alone. Maybe this election will be the stepping stone to actually affect change, because we have essentially paved the way for intolerance and bigotry to spread and infect the populace. Honestly, with the media in question, I am reminded of Harry Potter and Voldemort. And maybe, it is a long shot, but maybe the next four years won’t be the biggest debacle in American politics. However, that still does not speak of the hateful rhetoric and the spread of fear, the discrediting of journalistic media, and all the of the other things this campaign set aside to win. Like truth and ethics and morals.

It is so hard for me to make sense of this. I suppose, in all fairness, Hillary Clinton is actually winning the popular vote, as did Al Gore back in 2000, but due to the electoral college, that is not enough. Perhaps it will be enough this election cycle to affect change. It has certainly effected me; back in 2000 I didn’t have a child to worry about and my future was as uncertain as how many beers I was going to consume at the bar. I am a mother now, with a responsibility to stand up for what I believe and to show my child how to do the same. I have hope we can come together as nation and figure out acceptance and love. I have to believe this, otherwise, what is the point?

 

 

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